rough patcha road
so i'm kinda in an icky part of life right now. just finished directing this big show at Theater for the New City. I did a good job on it, if I do say so myself. It was a lot of work and not an easy project. So now that it's closed I'm feeling, well, bad. Since this one was such a toughie, I wasn't expecting this let down, but I what I'm walking around with is the feeling that I just moved a mountain and nothing in my life changed. i don't know what i was expecting but this deafening nothingness and feeling of futility is definitely not it. one of my friends couldn't understand it when i told him i didn't want to talk about it the fifth or sixth time he told me he'd really wanted to see my show. now he's mad at me. he has a need to make everything about him so i shouldn't be surprised. but i guess somehow i thought life would be different and it just isn't. i'm trying my best to get this next show organized. it's supposed to be a simple remount of a show i did last year but already it's turned into a major pain in my ass. i have to find a new musical director and the venue only confirmed half my dates so that's what i planned around and now i find we're supposed to cover all of them. plus this is for my friend who's mad at me because he didn't come see my show and i won't tell him it's okay's company so i have even less motivation to put it together. same shit. different day. different show. different year. i guess i feel like a different person, so i kind of want things to be different for me. i guess i can respond and act differently. in the words of Spanky McFarland, "I'll eat it, but I won't like it."
will finish my second leg warmer tonight while watching movies. am making the stitch n bitch nation leg warmers for my groovy friend maitee in purple and chartruese. photos to come. i promise!