When you've gone over something AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN like I have, certain questions get answered, OTHERS SPRING UP! You mind plays tricks on you, YOU PLAY TRICKS BACK! It's like you're unraveling a big cable-knit sweater that someone keeps on knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting..."

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

sock progress and a little vent

first off, i continue to obsess on the sock. an inch and a half to go and i start on the heel. oooo, yes!
okay, i get a gold star for yesterday. i play on a pool team and it's been kind of rough season for me personally. but i finally turned my game around and have won the last three matches in a row against better rated players than me. good!
well, little by little our team (CUE AS FOLK) has gone to 7th out or 8 to 2nd! We made it to the play offs! a first for me. i have two teammates that were on my gay pool league team that are reliable. then there's the third who was really psyched about playing and being on the team etc. but she has missed three matches. the 1st one was my fault partially b/c I didn't call and check in w/ her and tell her like I had started doing. after that she pulled me aside and said how upset she was and how she could never depend on me for anything without allowing me to give my side of it or anything. that upset me a lot but i thought--you know, what there is wrong on both sides here and it may just be wise to let this one go. so i did. then a few weeks later she didn't show. b/c she just plum forgot. okay. i was angry and i allowed it to fuck my game up. i mean who FORGETS! anyway, i thought well, the last time was my fault now were even. so last night, last game of the season. she doesn't show again! she overslept! AAAA! again, i started to rage, but slowly i reasoned myself out of it. what good does it do to tear her a new one? it was an accident and we don't get the games back if i make her cry. so i slowly let it go and i actually played really well and won. so, i was proud of myself for not going there, for making my point with her after the game diplomatically and realistically we only have to make it through playoffs. i don't think i will be playing with her again. it's frustrating when it's a friend. i cut her a break by getting her on the team and i want to help out and for her to have fun, but ultimately i don't trust that she's going to be there every week and I'm not interested in being a baby sitter. for her or anyone else. that's for letting me vent, friends! the playoffs start next week!

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

sock mad!

Okay, I have entered the wonderful world of sock-making and totally now get why people get so obsessed. First of all, if you're like me you're an obsessive knitter anyway. But having a portable project on teeny needles that go round and round in pretty yarn that's three dimensional and is going change directions and shape! I love it! Got a pattern from my friend Susi who swears by it. I pored of it trying to make sense of it and once I got the feeling that I was making it harder than it was by just reading it over and over and not just doing it, I dived in. I got some lovely blues and beiges Koigu and I'm sockin' out! I swear it's all I want to do. I was completely parked last night infront of the tv for two hours not goin' anywhere b/c i was deep into the sock. It's so different b/c the last thing i did was the mohair jacket on 10
s so going around and around on 2's is a trip! But it's a good one!

Monday, August 29, 2005

BOOK REVIEW and finished product (almost)

CAFFE CINO: The Birthplace of Off-Off-Broadway by Wendell C. Stone. That picture of me and my friend Chris was at the book party for this book. I was given a copy of the book and actually read it. It's really really good. Granted, I'm always interested in Theater History and I know and/or have worked with some of the folks in this book. But it's written in a very engaging matter. It's not dry and text book-y and gives you a real flavor of what was going on at the Cino and why, who were the people involved, what were they writing and why. It sets it in a relevant social/political/historical framework and what I appreciated most was it celebrates what the art and the artists of the place without romanticizing them or turning them into mythological creatures. Best of all, it's not boring, did I mention that?! I really appreciated the author's technique of using numerous interviews and quotes some contradictory to tell the story, rather than "This is the way it was." Gives you a chance to make up your own mind. I highly recommend this one.

I finished the Suss Cousins blue mohair jacket. The seams even look good! I'm so proud of myself b/c I did shaping. It has such an elegant drape to it. It went fast because essentially it was five long slender strips rather than big blocks of fabric. Showed it to a knitter friend and she said I need to block the front closed to keep it from curling. She's right. I didn't do a selvedge edge b/c it wasn't called for and I'm not that experienced. So I will do it b/c like she said "you want it to look good in the box." But it really came out nice! I will send pix when I give it to the birthday girl.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

i miss you, my friend.

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Tuesday, August 23, 2005

this house is warm

sorry i haven't been posting. but i been busy!
had my housewarming/belated birthday/annivesary/booksigning party on saturday. i was really freaked out about it b/c i realized that i haven't hosted a party of any kind for like ten years. anyway, i was freaked out. did i get enough food? would people come? would people be bummed there's no liquor? will my apt. ever be clean enough? will my air conditioning hold out?
turns out i was worrying needlessly. (who me?) although there was drama as the party started when the air co blew a fuse in the apartment and the fuse box is locked up in the basement and i had guests arriving and ice melting as i waiting around impatiently for the super to show up with the key. but eventually the power came back on again. had a great turn out. had a really good time. was so gratified that people from all chapters of my life --my oldest friend was one of the first guests to arrive to people I've only know for a couple of months--turned up and had a great time with each other. i have such wonderful people in my life. i am a grateful lucky man!
the apartment feels like it's my home now. that's the whole point of a housewarming isn't it? and it forced me to clean and decorate the place. i remember waking up the next morning and going into the living room and thinking wow, this looks like a living room who lives here? wait a minute, I live here!

Monday, August 08, 2005

Ruth, you won me back!

My friend Garet who turned me on to Ruth Rendell lent me another of her books after I told her about my disappointment with THE ROTTWEILER. I'm so glad she did b/c my faith in the power of the Rendell has been completely restored by HARM DONE.
RR writes a detective series along with her mystery novels. I prefer the novels to the series b/c in the series everyone's so real life unpleasant in a way only the british can be and the novels have more of a scope to them. HARM DONE is one of the series so I was less than enthusiastic, but I read it. IT WAS SO GOOD! This is the RR I know and love. Three or four story lines happening at the same time, all of them on a similar theme (in this case domestic violence) that unfold and continue to be surprising and unpredictable and satisfying literally until the last page. So I would highly recommend HARM DONE and you don't have to be up on the series. So good!
Not much else to report. It's SO HOT in NY, but this is news to no-one. The Suss jacket is cranking along. When I bought all the mohair to make it with the ladies at my LYS thought I was crazy. I said I just sit in front of my airconditioner and crank this out b/c it's all i have the energy for. Please! It's not like I"m taking this stuff to the beach.
Am having my housewarming party and am looking forward to it. It had been so long since I've had a party I forgot how, but it's coming back and i'm starting to get excited about it.
my coworker just told me Rosie O'Donnell is going into FIDDLER ON THE ROOF as Golda. Oh-kay. I wish I could be a good mo and say I love Rosie, but i'd be lyin'. I don't dislike her. She just scares me.

Monday, August 01, 2005


today is my first day here at the new gig at God's Love We Deliver. kind of mellow today in that I'm still learning everything, but the atmosphere here is SO different that anything I've encountered. everyone has been really nice friendly and helpful and genuinely glad to have me on board. there is no nerve/adreline rush in the air or coporate florescent pallor. it's cool. just wanted to check in.
also, i have started working on a simple Suss Cousins jacket for my pal Garet out of super kid mohair. not the most forgiving fiber in the world. i'm getting these mysterious holes. not dropped stitches. i think just large stitches. i go to fix them and i make runs. can't frog it out. not fun, but pretty. something to be said for mindless stockinette though. good tv watchin' work. and thank God they didn't take off my beloved Sanford and Son, just moved it up a half an hour before Good Times. gotta have my Freddy G and my Aunt Esther!