When you've gone over something AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN like I have, certain questions get answered, OTHERS SPRING UP! You mind plays tricks on you, YOU PLAY TRICKS BACK! It's like you're unraveling a big cable-knit sweater that someone keeps on knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting..."

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

this house is warm

sorry i haven't been posting. but i been busy!
had my housewarming/belated birthday/annivesary/booksigning party on saturday. i was really freaked out about it b/c i realized that i haven't hosted a party of any kind for like ten years. anyway, i was freaked out. did i get enough food? would people come? would people be bummed there's no liquor? will my apt. ever be clean enough? will my air conditioning hold out?
turns out i was worrying needlessly. (who me?) although there was drama as the party started when the air co blew a fuse in the apartment and the fuse box is locked up in the basement and i had guests arriving and ice melting as i waiting around impatiently for the super to show up with the key. but eventually the power came back on again. had a great turn out. had a really good time. was so gratified that people from all chapters of my life --my oldest friend was one of the first guests to arrive to people I've only know for a couple of months--turned up and had a great time with each other. i have such wonderful people in my life. i am a grateful lucky man!
the apartment feels like it's my home now. that's the whole point of a housewarming isn't it? and it forced me to clean and decorate the place. i remember waking up the next morning and going into the living room and thinking wow, this looks like a living room who lives here? wait a minute, I live here!

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